Nothing that comes through you is random
Sometimes the hardest part is trusting what arrives before we understand why it’s here.
As we move toward The Stride Room beginning in June, I’ve been reflecting deeply on what actually happens when we stop fighting the visions asking to move through us.
This story feels like an important part of that conversation.
“I’m just exhausted with fighting with myself all the time. Why can’t I just start working and release the damn thing?” she asked with full exasperation almost immediately after we entered the session.
It wasn’t the first time we had this conversation. We had been going back and forth on it for almost 2 weeks now.
I completely got it too.
Dhani was a Grief guide and shaman who was deeply passionate and called to guiding souls who had recently lost their loved ones. And just 2 weeks before, she had woken up with a vision for a space where people could write letters to the departed, communicate with them, and also work through everything else living underneath the grief: resentment, regret, anger, guilt, shame.
And as a part of the experience, she wanted to send carefully chosen gift boxes to every participant, no matter where they lived in the world, and guide them through shamanic journeys throughout the process, too.
“Am I insane? Am I nuts? What would people even think of me? Writing letters to the dead??!”
She had asked me the first time she brought the vision into one of our sessions.
And as someone who was slowly coming out of her own spiritual business closet then, I completely understood what she meant.
At the same time, I was also in awe of her. Of her idea, and how many people it had the possibility of helping. It was one of those moments where the respect you have for the person sitting in front of you exponentially increases, yet you can’t fully shake their shoulders and make them see it because that remembrance is a part of their own journey.
After she had fully let everything out, and after a beat of silence, I asked:
“What’s your body telling you? What are you really afraid of?”
That one session led to one of the most beautiful guided visualisations, peeling back layers and layers of fears and apprehensions. The root finally showed itself, and she shared:
“What if I’m wrong? It’s such a sensitive space, Shruthi. What if I fuck up? Lead them wrong? It could create a worse impact, couldn’t it?”
And there it was.
Not the fear of judgment.
Not even the fear of being seen.
The fear of trusting something so sacred that had moved through her… and being wrong about it. Of hurting someone else.
The fear of fully stepping into the vision and carrying the responsibility of it.
I think many of us know this feeling intimately, don’t we?
When something comes through us so strongly, so clearly, so persistently… yet every part of us still fights, delays, rationalises, questions, and pulls away from it.
Because deep down, we’re suddenly aware of our inner power, of its strength, its intensity, its sacredness and how much it can do.
Last year, I released something I’d have never even dreamed of releasing before.
It was a portal that had come through in a series of visions, with 8 identities that we carry within ourselves, a channelled message to give you answers to questions you probably didn’t know you had, tarot/oracle card reading + exercises associated with each identity.
The images were so visceral and the details so specific, it felt insane to be honest. My hands had to transfer the messages coming through into paper (laptop)…it felt like I was in a trance. I couldn’t fight it.
And part of me was terrified.
Because one, this was the first time something like this had happened. The experience itself was new. And secondly, most importantly, I had never channelled 1:many before. It was always 1:1, direct. I had experienced sharing the messages that came through, and my mind had a chance to look at the expressions of the person sitting in front of me and soothe that she isn’t going nuts, you know? But this? How can something so specific and visceral come through for a group of people? Logically, it did not sound right at all.
But I continued.
And released it, even while I was scared.
It felt like following the universe’s breadcrumbs. Signs that kept me going…that there was a reason to all this madness (that’s how it felt like then). To trust one step at a time, one day at a time. To breathe through the whole process.
I still have a folder filled with messages from people who received the space.
I cried almost every day with them.
Thanking the universe for allowing the space to come through, for trusting even when I didn’t trust myself, filled with so much gratitude.
I did understand collective consciousness until then, but with Unspoken Selves, I finally felt it in the body. Because nothing is random, and there’s always a reason for everything that comes through us.
It’s our job to trust the messages even if we can’t comprehend shit in the moment.
Dhani ended up releasing the space into the world in the most unexpected ways.
That’s the thing most people don’t get. When we get out of our own way and surrender to the process completely, the universe itself shows us the path for who the space is supposed to reach.
We just need to listen.
As a part of her vision, one of the starkest images that came through was that she was supposed to email this grief support group that she had come across a few days back.
She knew nothing about the admins who ran it, and wasn't a part of the group either. But something kept nudging her to email them, incessantly. To share her space with the admins in the email.
We did it together. In the session itself.
She got a response 30 min later from one of the admins, sharing that this is exactly similar to what they were looking for, and they were ready to allow her to run the program as part of the group itself and pay her the exact amount, too.
A month later, she ended up running her first beta group with that community, with 6 beautiful souls who exactly needed it. Then she went on to run 2 more cohorts of it, too. Unsurprisingly, it was also exactly what those souls needed to grieve fully and reach the next stage.
It’s insane, isn’t it?
How much we fight something so pure that arrives through us. How much we block and stand in our own path. How much we question and doubt and spiral.
Even though I used to hate all those internal fights, over time I’ve come to believe they’re necessary too. They build discernment. They teach us how to trust what comes through despite it all.
And somehow, the dreams and visions only become stronger every time we go through the process, don’t they?
I’ve now watched this unfold again and again. In my own life, and in the lives of the people I work with.
The point of the journey isn’t to completely get rid of all this. It’s to learn how to walk with it. To breathe through it. And to still trust what comes through us anyway.
That’s deeply a part of what we’ll be holding inside The Stride Room, too.
A (5+1) week group program for 5 aligned souls who are ready to stop fighting the spaces asking to move through them, and finally shape them into something real.
In this room, we don’t invent. We listen to what the space demands and shape it into something real.
Know more about the space here.
Disclaimer: Dhani is a hypothetical client created by weaving together fragments of multiple client experiences over the years, to protect their privacy while sharing the deeper essence of the work.
Wow, Shruthi, such beautiful, creative ideas from the Universe. I love this!